I was stood under the shower thinking about the weekend just gone. I was thinking what had happened and when was it going to happen again. I was thinking about my hip pain and my back pain. I was thinking about normality. I was thinking about my mum and my boyfriend and doctors appointments and letting people down and I had butterflies in my tummy and tears in my eyes and I thought to myself – babe, you need to get in the kitchen.
I pulled out all the pots and all the bowls and started measuring out all of the ingredients for muffins. I had plenty of ripe fruit lingering in my kitchen, so before I knew it, I had a tray of banana muffins in the oven, plus two pots on the go of stewed fruit.
When I was slicing up the apples and plums for my compote, I felt my shoulders relax. It was the rhythmic chopping and smell of baking bananas that brought me back down to earth. I often make excuses when I’m not feeling well that I can’t cook. It hurts, it takes too long, I’m tired. But my baking session the other day taught me the value of cooking they may have been lost due to everything else that’s been going on. It’s just so relaxing.
Before having investigations for endo, I would be in the kitchen most days. I do tire more easily, but when I’m feeling up to it, I really should prioritise my cooking. It makes me feel more like me. I’ve been offered counselling and group sessions but what really helps me is the thing that has always helped me – food.
I would recommend cooking as a therapy and as an excellent stress reliever. Do you find cooking relaxing? What’s your favourite thing to make when you’re feeling out of sorts? Tell me all about it in the comments section or come find me on Instagram @boowholefoods